What Many Survivors Want to Communicate, But Can’t

My friend wanted to explain to others that think they are supporting her by making suggestions about what to do with her severely brain injured son although they don’t understand what she is going through. She asked me to write something that would explain his condition. I want to share what I wrote because a severely brain injured friend of mine read it and said it is meaningful and spot on. Here goes:

A severe traumatic brain injury is what Brandi Smith’s grown son has. It is brain dysfunction caused by an outside force, usually a violent blow to the head. Teshawn was in a horrific car accident. He was in a coma and on life support for 10 days. The prognosis for even functioning in life again was very poor. Brandi took him home when there was no place in Rehab for him. She helped him relearn how to walk, bathe, brush his teeth and so much more, things we take for granted on a daily basis. When you have a severe brain injury your brain is like the game Scrabble. Imagine the tiles mixed up and thrown down on the table. That is the brain of a severely brain injured person. I read a book called Rambling Down Life’s Road by Kevin Pettit. Brain injured himself, he says in there, “Sometimes you act like a total jerk and throw a chair at your wife. It’s not because you are a dick, it’s because your brain is fucked up.” You become this new person. You are a stranger to your family and a stranger to yourself. You do things that are out of your control. Most severely brain injured people have an anger control problem. It’s like your behaviors belong to someone else. So much of the time you don’t even know you are going to behave a certain way until it’s over and you stand there surprised wondering, “Who was that?” “Where did that come from?” What makes you, you, has been messed up and makes you not act like yourself.

Many brain injured people have immense personality changes in their emotions, attitude, temperament, and many times physical changes. They become unfiltered having little or no control over what comes out of their mouth. Impulsively reacting, poor comprehension, speed of it, or lack of it. The world becomes a confusing place. You become overwhelmed, overstimulated by lights, sounds, and people. Your brain suffers exhaustion no nap can cure. Or you can’t sleep at all. Your IQ often goes down along with your self-esteem. And capabilities to live in a world where you can be independent, manage money, make poor decisions, and lose your friends that just don’t understand, and more times than not don’t care to learn. Brain injured survivors may lose their sense of taste and/or smell, are not capable or cannot feel empathy, due to where their brain is injured, along with many that no longer have the ability to cry. Such a large number suffer depression and anxiety. Either the chemicals in their brain are no longer balanced, or they think about who they are now and what they can no longer accomplish. They, with reason, become depressed. Teshawn is only two years into his brain injury journey and healing process. Recovery from a severe traumatic brain injury takes a lifetime.

Teshawn has mental illness. He had it before his injury and it has been made worse after his brain injury. As an adult no one can force him to get treatment and he refuses it.

Brandi is having such a difficult time with these behaviors her son has been showing as of late. Your support and prayers are so much appreciated. Suggestions are not. She appreciates the good intensions.

Survivors and caregivers, can you relate?

Next week I will be posting a blog about different therapies that may be available and helpful to brain injured individuals that will accept help.  Please come read it to find out what they are next Friday, Feb. 16, 2024.

Thank you for taking the time to read my blog. Do not hesitate to like, comment, or subscribe. If you subscribe you will automatically receive an email telling you I posted a new blog, which normally takes place on Fridays.

If you would like to know about our trials and triumphs as Veronica and I recover from our brain injuries, please read my book titled,

A Miracle a Day, One Day at a Time: Hope After Traumatic Brain Injury 

https://store.bookbaby.com/book/a-miracle-a-day-one-day-at-a-time

Please press the above link if you are interested. It will take you directly to my book.

Have a beautiful week.