!6 years ago, my daughter and I were in a horrific car accident that left us both brain injured. Three weeks I was hospitalized and upon coming home I found myself sitting in a small space between our China hutch and the dining room table mistakenly thinking I was squished in our wrecked car. I was screaming and crying as I did that day. I had hit my head which needed nine staples, but what really hurt was my back and left leg. I had six breaks in my pelvis. I saw my daughter slumped over the steering wheel and did not understand what I was seeing. I was never more confused. This is what I saw and felt. My husband reported this behavior to a doctor and I quickly began counseling. I was somehow able to get past that terror with talk therapy. What wasn’t so easy to get past is what I saw when I walked into Veronica’s hospital room shortly after she came out of a coma. There she lay, head rolling to the right over and over with her eyes rolling back in her head. It was like a horror movie, a sight I couldn’t unsee. We asked the doctor what was happening. He said, “Her brain is waking up.” OK. It’s a good thing. But why can’t I stop feeling startled and crying hysterically every time I think about it? I could not get this sight out of my head. I went to a therapist that knew how to perform EMDR treatment. How holding this vibrating stick in each hand and concentrating on this scene could help me, I did not understand. I was totally skeptical. Each time I saw this therapist we would talk about what I saw.
EMDR-Eye movement desensitization and reprocessing therapy. It is a mental health treatment technique that involves moving your eyes a specific way while you process traumatic memories. EMDR’s goal is to help you heal from trauma or other distressing life experiences. Often our brain stores trauma memories in a way that doesn’t allow for healthy healing. Trauma is like a wound. Because it didn’t have a chance to heal, your brain didn’t receive the message that the danger is over. During normal events your brain stores memories smoothly. It also networks them, so they connect to other things you remember. During disturbing or upsetting events, that networking doesn’t happen correctly. The brain can go “offline” and there is a disconnect between what you experience (feel, hear, or see) and what your brain stores in memory through language. People with a history of flashbacks describe feeling as if they were reliving a disturbing event. The past becomes the present. Resource: EMDR Therapy my.clevelandclinic.org
The process itself. So, there I sat holding an electronic device in each hand, while I could feel pulsing in each hand, buzzing, alternating between each side. Time goes by so quickly. Before I knew it, somehow, I could think of this horrific sight I saw and not feel anything. It was like thinking, “I drank a glass of water.” Veronica didn’t have to do EMDR because we, she and I, talked about everything that happened to us so much, every day for years, allowing us to process and heal. I believe talking about a certain event helps the healing process. It’s just part of our story now.
There are so many different therapies that can heal our overactive minds. For the therapies we have had available during our journey, I am so grateful I have chosen to utilize them. I am better for it today.
If you would like to know more about the first 12 years of our journey, please read my book titled,
A Miracle a Day, One Day at a Time: Hope After Traumatic Brain Injury https://store.bookbaby.com/book/a-miracle-at-a-time-one-day-at-a-time
Press the link above and it will take you directly to my book if you are interested in purchasing it.
I do appreciate you taking the time to read my blog. If you are offered therapy, any kind, there is a reason someone thinks you need it. Please be open to getting help.
Have a beautiful week and count your blessings, even the small ones. It will make your week better.
Dawn Corbelli 